The holy grail

It's not the calm of the evening,

It's not the beauty in the storm,

It's not the look at the ceiling,

the back against the floor

It's not the words I never said,

the pressure on my chest,

the voice cracks when I start singing

where I found that perfect line

And I played that song, it was a mundane dream,

And I wrote those lines, said what I didn't mean,

And I screamed my heart out for sympathy,

And I dried my eyes and carried on being me

It's not a random flash of light,

It's not the tears that fail to hide,

It's not the thousand lines you write,

It's not the dance you'll never have

I started ruining my hairdo,

My eyes were fixed on the door,

I crawled my way out my hideout

and I was done with that last rhyme

And I played that song, it was a masterpiece,

And I sang those lies, they all made sense to me,

And I screamed I'd lied, they all believed in me,

And I thought I'd cry, but kept that smile on me

--

And I played that song, it was a mundane dream,

And I wrote those lines, said what I didn't mean,

And I screamed my heart out for sympathy,

And I dried my eyes and carried on being me

I played that song, it was a masterpiece,

And I sang those lies, they all made sense to me,

And I screamed I'd lied, they all believed in me,

And I thought I'd cry, but kept that smile on me

On the other line 

If I see your ghost I'll try to resurrect you

And if you're cold and barely stand

I'll be on the other line

Never ready to be found, I'll be suspicious,

kiss the kisses back, afraid of getting what I want

In your loving eyes I see the bottom of the pit

I can't help but close my eyes and feed this parasite

Can I just never wake up?

If you make it home tonight... It's fine, I'll wait

Just don't let me ruin the surprise

Shoot across my heart so I can't see you walk away

and grant me the relief of being gone

Maybe I don't want to live in past days anymore

In your loving eyes I see the bottom of the pit

I can't wait to close my eyes and feed this parasite

And If I ever see you again I'll watch from the distance, 

scratch the wound that never heals.

Pull me out of dreams, kiss the eyes shut, wipe the tears,

tear my heart, my lungs apart

so you're no longer part of me

In my eyes you'll see that I 

won't hold a final tear, won't be afraid to fear

I'll know I can only drop 

your hand and hold you back

And I'm never waking up

Tokyo

She was certainly the first I met

She said "wait my dear, dinner's not ready yet"

There's still some much more to come

Streets to run and rooms to roam

Through the kitchen door I saw the scythe she used to reap them young hearts

And with a false and charming smile

She brought a meal that I could never grab 

I was introduced to friends

They gathered around, told me "this is your place"

A dark and crowded corner 

in the middle of that holy space 

I was meant to love, I was told to embrace,

She said "take this chance my lord, you won't regret"

And then she turned her back on us

and as we were left alone this is what they said:

"Let's play a little game, just for a while before you go

I heard it's fun, easy to do, I heard they call it Tokyo

They say we shouldn't do, and you will never do

It puts a smile on your face, but you don't have one of those"

Parks, dark cats... lucky to be with the folks

it's brand new, loud, it's snowing in the bathroom

Have you gone insane? Or am I going insane?

"No", she said,

as she placed her hand on my thigh,

I then realised it was around my neck

I felt in love, 'cause I felt safe

It looked like love, it tastes like hate

I bent before I broke, that's what it was about

Congrats, my angel,

You've proved your point, you've lost the round

Splinters spilled all over the ground

Splinters spilled all over the ground

I woke up, there she was

With a user in his uniform 

They approached and greeted my goodbye:

"Welcome down below   

This is what you are     

Bear your burden,    

you were never who you are"

"Let's play a little game, just for a while before you go

I heard it's fun, easy to do, I heard they call it Tokyo

They say we shouldn't do, and you will never do

It puts a smile on your face, but you don't have one of those"

"Let's play a little game, just for a while before you go

I heard it's fun, easy to do, I heard they call it Tokyo

They say we shouldn't do, and you will never do

It puts a smile on your face, but you don't have one of those"

As the morning comes I stand my ground

Perhaps it's time we said goodbye  

Today we'll say goodbye          

And you're so good at that     

Today we'll say goodbye           

But you're too good at that        

Today we'll say goodbye            

And God, you're good at that!     

You're good, you're God, you're mad  

"You're sane, you're plain, you're sad"

"Be free, be me, be mine"

"Caress this gift that's life",

they say, they said... They're dead    

Am I? What's "fine"? What's next?    

They say, they said... They're dead   

but living in my head.